Satan, Santa, and Spray Paint

One of our favorite shop rats came in yesterday and he is one step closer to becoming Joe.

This sucks for Joe because A. River is 14 and gets no ladies. B. River has braces and gets no ladies. And C. River is rockin’ a ponytail.
Joe, Justin and I and the rest of Boston have been trying to tell River that only horses have ponytails and unless he creates a time machine or picks up all future ladies at a Phish concert he better cut that shit now. So, we will put it to a vote…

Should River cut off his lame ponytail?

Yes, only Michael Bolton can rock a dope pony.
No, a ponytail will be perfect for him when he goes to prison.
Maybe he should start by changing his name, then get a haircut.

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Here’s a random sight that I see everyday on my way to the Proletariat. NEVER park your car in front of this barber shop. This dude throws a loaf of Wonder bread out of the front door everyday and flying rats from all over the city eat and crap everywhere.

Finally, intern Taylor took it upon herself to reorganize and stock the entire graffiti case with morsels of Christmas cheer. Dudes, if you want your girlfriend to buy you ill shit, you better send her now, because for some of this stuff we might not get more in by the holiday.