February 4, 2023

Q. Do I have a big or small penis? Find out the truth here!

Every man wonders and possibly believes they have the biggest penis in the room. Many of us have seen our friend’s junk and thought wow, is my johnson that grande? We have had our fair share of lovers over the years and some might comment and others might not and we just hope that those moans of satisfaction are because our penis is so huge that it is actually hurts a bit. Well, let’s get down to business. It’s time to get out a ruler or in my case a yardstick (zing!), and see how you truly measure up. First of all, get up and lock the door. This is not one of the finer moments of a man’s life and surely not one you want your mom, granny, or sister to walk in on. You should also make sure you are feeling warm because shrinkage can easily take off an inch to two inches. Start by measuring your salami from base to tip while it is limp.

The average male measures 3-4″ from tip to base with the average being 3.75.”

All of these figures come from the distinguished American researchers Masters and Johnson (you couldn’t pick a better group of names!) who measured the penile lengths of more than 300 men.

The largest organ was 5.5 inches in the flaccid state. It belonged to a slim man who was 5′ 7″ tall. The smallest penis measured 2.25 inches. It belonged to a fairly heavily built man of 5′ 11″. It’s also worth pointing out that there is no correlation between penile size and race.

As for those of you who are only sporting a mushroom cap that barely crests the bush, all is not lost. The good news is besides the jr. high locker room, for the most part no one will ever see your tiny tim unless it is erect. Interestingly, most penises are very much the same size when erect. Here’s a little help to get on to the next stage of measuring…

The man whose non-erect penis is smallish will usually achieve about a 100% increase in length during sexual excitement. The man whose non-erect penis is on the largish size will probably manage about a 75% increase. This means the great majority of penises measure between 6-7 inches when erect, with the average figure being about 6.5 inches.

So you can see that even if a man has got a millimeter peter, he’s got a built-in compensating factor that will bring him up to close to the same size as the guy who appears to be packing heat in the shower room.

Now for the good news. Virtually every man forgets that it doesn’t matter how long or how short your penis is, because the vagina will accommodate itself to any length. The vagina of a woman who hasn’t had a child is only 3 inches long when she’s not sexually excited. The figures for women who have had babies are only slightly different. Even when aroused, a woman’s vagina usually extends only to a length of about 4 inches. This means any man’s penis will fill her vagina completely, unless you happen to be one of those rare guys with an erect penile length of less than four inches. (AND in that case you might as well become a priest because obviously God never intended for you to use it.) You’re probably now wondering how the average man with an erection of six inches manages to insert his penis into the vagina at all.

The vagina has the most remarkable capacity for lengthening if something is introduced into it gradually and it will lengthen by 150% to 200% to accommodate him.

Now if you are actually doing all this measuring shit you should get used to beating off, because you are obviously not ready to be with a real woman.

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