December 5, 2022

Being an Ill Dude | Omelets


Now that the new blog is up an running we plan on having a few reoccurring themes. Since many of our readers are men — and to be honest the ones of you I know are pretty fucking rad — I figured we should start cataloging what makes us fucking awesome. I know it’s narcissistic, but we all know things that make us cool and it’s easy to recognize the things our friends do that make them cool which is how we came up with “Being an Ill Dude.”
(I had to give it a retarded title or else you might think we are trying too hard.) Things that make you an ill dude are simple: knowing how to do a windmill on the dancefloor, having a graffiti handstyle, knowing how to hang a picture on the wall, knowing how to roll a joint…the list goes on. I hope some of you submit ideas to us and if you want to curate a post on something you are an expert at, please drop us an email. Our first B.A.I.D. post is on Omelets.
The omelet is a manly way to wake up your lady after a night of passionate Scrabble playing. It isn’t boring and simple like scrambled eggs — it actually makes you seem sophisticated and deep. It’s also a great way to get rid of whatever leftovers you have stinking up your fridge. All you need is a few eggs — and then whatever else you have laying around. I happened to have some cherry tomatoes, some goat cheese, ham, spinach, and red peppers. Take all of your ingredients, cut them up into some bite-sized pieces, and toss them in with your eggs.
Add salt and pepper, and pour into your skillet. Keep the temperature on low and take your time — burnt eggs are nasty like phlegm. Take out a spatula, and when it seems like you can fold one side over on the other, do it. Let it cook a little longer and you are good to go. Being married, I actually had an avocado lying around, and some salsa — but I know I never had that shit as a bachelor. (I eat a lot fucking better now that I am married.)
Anyways, if you need a bachelor version of this, take two eggs, tear the cheese off of last night’s pizza, and take a few pieces of pepperoni or Canadian bacon from said pizza and toss them in the eggs as well. Shit will be delicious!

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