And the Oscar goes to…

Fuck you Pau Gasol, you acting foul catching piece of shit! You are a bigger actor than all the fake ass fans who show up at your games just because that is the only way their publicist can get them in the spotlight. To all the celebs besides Jack Nicholson…your role as a Lakers Fan was probably the best role you have ever played. And Gasol, thank you for bringing the wackness of European soccer player fouls to the NBA. You have forever pussified the game. Fuck you, you suck.

And finally Boston Police. Was it really necessary to drive 30 police motorcycles through Allston at halftime to try to scare us into not rioting? I’ve never seen so many people at once go from watching a game and not thinking about police to all chanting fuck the police in record time. Maybe it is your presence that creates riots? Maybe the news reports that there will be 120 extra officers on hand makes people think there is going to be a spectacle worth seeing? Finally, Mr. Kobe Bryant. You will never be Michael Jordan. You will always be remembered as a rapist with a big checkbook. We have no respect for you, your gold digging wife, or your probably innocent kids who unfortunately have your last name. I’m glad you are good at basketball because you seem to have fucked everything else up that was good to you.