Jason deCaires Taylor: Artist, Realtor to the Fish

Internet, meet Jason deCaires Taylor: underwater sculptor extraordinaire.

Taylor is an artist-type person and his most recent installation is underwater, meaning that it is only accessible by scuba diving. Let me tell you something about scuba diving: it’s fucking terrifying and awful. Last week I was in St. Croix and went scuba diving for the first time because that’s what people do on a tropical vacation. I had seen images of divers floating majestically through a glorious underwater world of rainbows and colorful fish. Those images are LIES!!!!!! If you are at all claustrophobic you will want to throw up and poop yourself at the same time. I was sweating in my suit the whole time and just wanted out. Thank god I could pee in the ocean without anyone knowing (it’s between you and me, fish. Oops, and the internet), because I was panicking down in those briny depths.  I felt like goddamn Chuckie Finster next to all of the brave divers in my group. Ugh, never again.

I wish I weren’t a big land-loving baby because Taylor’s art looks really good and I want to go to there. Just recently he sculpted an exhibit which features a house for fishes and other underwater beasts. There are even different entrances for different creatures, based on size and swimming style.

According to his website: 

In 2006, Taylor founded and created the world’s first underwater sculpture park. Situated off the coast of Grenada in the West Indies it is now listed as one of the Top 25 Wonders of the World by National Geographic. His latest creation is MUSA (Museo Subaquatico de Arte), a monumental museum with a collection of over 450 public sculptural works, submerged off the coast of Cancun, Mexico; described by Forbes as one of the world’s most unique travel destinations. Both these ambitious, permanent public works have a practical, functional aspect, facilitating positive interactions between people and fragile underwater habitats while at the same relieving pressure on natural resources.

In the words of Ina Garten, how great is that?

If you need me I’ll be snorkeling in my bathtub. #practice